Backyard Landscaping Like a Boss

Matt. Seriously guys, there is no man on this planet more awesome than my husband. He loves the outdoors, landscaping, gardening, planting. And thank goodness for that because, in my world, the thought of even something as simple as mowing a lawn sounds horrible.

Not to say I don’t like the outdoors. I do. It’s just that most of the activities I enjoy doing outside involve water and relaxing next to it.

Put me on a beach, beside a river, lakeside, in my pool. Give me a canoe, floaties, a low-seated chair that allows me to dig my toes into the sand while I read a cheezy book.

Ahhhhh……

Raking, pruning, hoeing, and tilling? Uh, no thanks. Nature is supposed to be about having fun, breaking away from the mundane life of a rat on a wheel. To me, landscaping, gardening, is not spending time in nature. It’s torture. Especially under the hot Arizona sun.

But, my husband enjoys taking on all of that stuff. He feels a huge level of pride when he completely transforms the front yard from ghetto weed garden to Zen-raked gravel perfection.

And he should take pride.

I won’t deny that it always looks great, but I also won’t deny that I’m thrilled I wasn’t the one who had to get it to that point.

But he’s a virtual rock star with a pitchfork. Or, in this case, a tiller.

So, our general plan is to break up the monotony of the backyard and install an area where we might actually hang out. Somewhere other than our covered patio. The grassy area in our backyard has been nothing more than a waste of water and excuse to use the lawn mower for far too long.

The time has finally come to put our money where our tiller is and get to work!

Just like the pool refill and bar project, this backyard story is probably best told in photos. Things are moving pretty quickly around here so by the end of this weekend we should have even more done out back. I’ll be sure to post another update when we get the rest of the materials installed.

You’ll see in the photos that there’s two patches of lawn, those will stay, and a whole bunch of dirt. Within the dirt areas around the outside, Matt wants to plant some small ground plants, some trees (palm and citrus) and then fill with a pea-stone sized, sand-toned gravel.

That same gravel will fill the outside edges of the inner rectangle of dirt, and set up inside that we’re building a concrete paver patio and fire pit.

Before getting started. Though, to be fair,
we already did a bit of retaining wall
and brick removal in the far back right corner
in order to have the block wall painted.

Not sure how this part of the process became my job.
A couple blisters and aching biceps later and
about half of the brick is gone. Most of it needed prying
out from under lawn, hence the 2 foot crowbar.

First pass with the tiller, a brand new tool for Matt.
He loves when I take pictures of him mid project!

Second pass (maybe more?) and lawn is finally
disappearing into soil. I really shouldn't
complain about my aching biceps after pulling,
like, 300 bricks. My husband is going to be jacked.

Oh yeah, did I mention that, because of the state
of the crabgrass type lawn, Matt had to rake out
after every pass and sometimes in between? Yeah.

Two days tiller rental and she's ready for digging!

Seriously, he totally crushed this job. There's a bit more to do to
even it out but we'll be out there digging, tamping, laying weed block,
raking out gravel, and building a fire pit in no time!
Please pass the marshmallows...

And, yes, before you ask, I do plan to help out with some of this (mostly the paver/pit areas because I’m a boss at that part). It’s far too hot out there already for Matt to try to do all of this on his own.

But, solar rings are already floating in the fresh, clean pool. So, you can bet your ass I’ll end my workday with a fruity drink and a swim!

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In addition to this drivel I also write books, both fiction and non-fiction.
Learn more on my author page.

What is Your Favorite Book?

A question I’ve asked, and been asked, over and over again in my life.

Is it bad that my gut reaction these days is to respond:

“Either my Shaw McLeary Mystery books, starting of course with Reckless Abandon or my most recently released California Dreamin’ book, Makeup Your Mind.”

I guess that’s just the shameless self-promoting writer in me talking though, right?

Because, if I really think about what makes a book a favorite book, the criteria might actually preclude my own. (Well, okay, not all of my own but definitely a few.)

For me to call it a favorite, I want a book that stays with me. For years after I read it. I don’t necessarily want to remember every minute detail of the plot, dialogue, story, but I definitely need to remember the way a book made me feel.

And I don’t care if I feel scared, sad, happy, or any other of the numerous emotions I align to while lost in a fantasy world. I just need that feeling to show up.

Books, and I’m talking fiction here, are written to make you feel. At least, I think they should be written for that reason.

You should be uncomfortable. Afraid to sleep at night. Turned on. Wiping away tears. Laughing and nodding while saying out loud “girl, I’ve so been there!”

Because you’re supposed to become one with the characters. You’re supposed to be inside that fantasy world for all intents and purposes.

Otherwise, what’s the point of reading?

To me, I love books that play in my head like a movie, whether that book has been made into a visual representation or not.

For example, when I heard that Lord of the Rings was being made I immediately went out and bought the book so I could read it first. Especially with an epic novel like that, I want to see the characters, scenes, settings in my imagination before I see what someone else sees (like Peter Jackson).

And I was glad I did because, just like every other book-turned-movie, there was so much more to discover in the crafted words than on the screen. And that’s saying a lot because those are some of my favorite movies of all time.

But, I’ve been thinking a lot about what my favorite books are, because a writing colleague recently posted a quote from one of my childhood favorites, The Velveteen Rabbit.

This isn’t my original copy. The truth is, I was really sad when I realized I think my original copy is gone forever. Lost in one of my many moves or prior learning experiences.

That makes me sad because I read the hell out of this book until I was well into high school. Ask me if I give a shit that’s it’s allegedly written for kids.

Hint: I don’t.

So I got on Amazon and ordered up another copy. I wanted to see for myself if the feeling I carried around for this book remained the same when re-reading as an adult.

Truth? I think I might have enjoyed it even more in my middle age.

I hate to use the word “classic” because I think that puts a certain connotation in people’s minds about the literary hoity-toity-ness and/or age of a book. But, that’s exactly what The Velveteen Rabbit is, a classic piece of literature.

As a kid I struggled with acceptance. With being bullied. With a general sense of being different than everyone else. Because I was. And back then that was considered a bad thing. Kids didn’t know how to own their shit like they do in these times***.

In the 80’s it wasn’t cool to wear hand-me-downs. It wasn’t cool to be poor in my hometown, because poor meant you couldn’t afford the latest and greatest fashions, music, outer symbols of being cool. And everyone was doing it. Everyone was so much cooler than me.

So I read, and re-read, books like The Velveteen Rabbit because it was a book about owning your shit.

Who cares if you’re perfect? Perfection is grossly overrated and, like we discover in the pages of Margery Williams' book, it is only after we’ve been essentially ridden hard and put away wet that we discover the true beauty of who we are on the inside.

Because outsides are just glamour.

What really matters is our soul, spirit, how we treat other people, how we treat ourselves. And even though none of us asked to be here, we all have a reason to be walking this earth. Every single one of us has value, a purpose.

The rabbit fulfilled his purpose and ended up even more alive in the end.

Talk about a book that, still to this day, makes me feel!

What’s your favorite, or some of your favorite books, and why do you love them?

***I totally understand that bullying and the like is still a huge issue today and maybe even more so because of the web and social media. I do not mean to belittle what happens in the circles of today’s youth by trying to say things were worse when I was younger. What I mean is that, in my day, we didn’t have an outlet to find other people who felt different and connect to that sense of community (in an anonymous way) like kids have available today. The web is a place of destruction and community. As a kid incessantly picked on for most of my childhood I would have loved to have the resources available to me that kids have these days. If you are being bullied or are otherwise feeling helpless, hopeless, please reach out to trained professionals that can help you remember how fucking amazing you are. A good place to start: StopBullying.gov with links to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

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In addition to this drivel I also write books, both fiction and non-fiction.
Learn more on my author page.

Go Back to the Bah!

Or, bar, as they say pretty much everywhere outside of the Boston metro area.

But this post has nothing to do with scuzzy, seedy, or even swanky locals that ply you with watered down booze and terribly loud music all in the hopes that you show up again and again despite how you end up feeling the next morning.

Nope. This is all about our bar. Or, rather, the pantry cabinet, dry bar area of our kitchen remodel.

I got the last of this project completed a couple days ago. FINALLY! And I’m not gonna lie. I freaking love the way this turned out.

Despite my tears (I blame menopause), bruises (both to my ego and back of my hand which is still tingly), and curse words I didn’t even know I knew, in the end I’m fully in love with the overall result!

Much like the pool project (if you haven’t read about how Matt convinced me to replace our “bad water full of dissolved solids” and power wash our pool, you can catch up on that gem here), the photos of the bar project give a much better overall view so I’ll let their captions do the talking.

Design concept, stain/spray paint application, and install of every last piece were mine.

The only things Matt helped with: pre-drilling the holes for the flange anchors, and adjusting a couple of the flanges to level out the shelves. I didn’t know how to do the leveling before, but now I do, so in the future I could do 100% of this project myself.

Thankfully, there won’t be a next time because she’s done, son! (Sorry, been watching a lot of Psych re-runs lately.)

Here’s the bah, er, bar, coming together before your very eyes. For me it took just over two weekends to complete.

Materials on hand other than the wall covering.

Almost immediately after snapping this pic I went to grab the level.
Apparently I have zero sense of depth perception these days.
Hit the bottom of it with my fingers, it rolled over and
smashed down onto the back of my hand.
It hurt worse than most construction injuries I've ever had.
Still tingly nerve damage in some spots but it's mostly healed now.

Does something seem, off to you?

Anchors away!

Yeah, off by an inch. Which I actually measured twice.
I was so tired at this point it doesn't surprise me I made the mistake.
Guess she'll be done next weekend...

Like it never even happened.

Oh yeah, Matt also cut my shelves for me,
because I'm still not comfy with power tools that can cut off my fingers.
Dry fit perfection on the first try!

So I had this genius idea to spray paint the pipe caps
to match the glass hardware we have in most of the kitchen.
They don't exactly line up straight on but I still love it.
Also, the pine has a vinegar stain and dead flat varnish top coat.

No, I didn't want to mess with faux on a laminate surface.
Yes, this is heavy weight vinyl paper printed to look like wood.
The bulk of my invented curse words came during this phase.
Note to self, don't pull the backing off before lining up.
Eventually I got the hang of it and it went much smoother.

Under-side shelf clamps installed to hold everything in place.
I literally had to lie on my back on the countertop
to do this part of the install. Thankfully,
the somewhat fragile tops didn't crack under my weight!

And she's done!
Thanks to my friend JC for the daffodils, they
made for a beautiful accent to the finished project!
I'll eventually place my shot glass collection on
the top shelf but need to unpack them all first.

And now it’s back to writing because I’m just getting too damn old to be up and down a ladder all day long.

Then again, I do still need a kitchen backsplash and that doesn’t even involve a ladder so…

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In addition to this drivel I also write books, both fiction and non-fiction.
Learn more on my author page.