Saturday, July 19, 2008

There are No Words but I Have to find Some or I Will Go Mad

The call came through at 4:24 this past Tuesday, I was down getting the mail at the time and my phone was safely located in the apartment so I never even heard the voicemail ring back until an hour later when my mom called. I had just spent a few hours working on something that I was falling in love with -- a story about a girl living in NYC who wins a substantial sum in the lottery and suddenly watches her entire life change before her eyes from her friends to her family to herself and her values. I had started the story on the Vineyard while on vacation last week. The more I wrote Tuesday the more I could see it turning into a novel. The characters were forming in my brain and actually coming through on the page; I was feeling the same inspired vibe I got while we were away the week before as I furiously typed chapter one. The moment I picked up that voicemail though vacation seemed like a million miles away and characters snapped back to reality.

B called to let us know that S had been admitted to the hospital. I have talked about S&B a lot here because they are the coolest and closest friends to Matt & me. As a couple it is a rare thing indeed to find another couple you just gel so well with, another couple who shares many of the same views on life, sense of humor and overall disposition. My stomach flipped immediately. She had a regularly scheduled ultrasound and her glucose test that afternoon. The twins are not even due until early October. I could not ascertain from B’s message whether she or they were ok. Come to find out later that is because she had only been admitted less than a half hour before and even she did not completely grasp what was going on at that moment. Matt and I had a quick pizza for dinner and went in to visit her without a second of hesitation.

I have no children, have never been pregnant but have three nephews that I could literally squeeze to death with hugs if given the chance. S&B’s twins will surely be my forth and fifth nephews. Heck, B already calls me Auntie Jenn when he is talking to the dog so I figure it’s a given with the babies. I have no idea how S was feeling when they admitted her but as the pregnant mom to be (who up until that moment mind you was feeling like a million bucks, read: no contractions, no pain, no problems) I can imagine she was somewhere between panic and, well, panic.

As this week has progressed she managed to find out some information about the situation at hand. First, she had been one centimeter dilated and one of the babies was seemingly making his way toward the exit because he was riding so low. Not exactly an ideal situation when there are nine weeks left until the due date so that is one of the main reasons they admitted her. No. That was the reason. These boys are showing they will be born to the ideal family; overachievers just like their parents. Her glucose came back fine and heartbeats for all 3 of them were normal. I can not speak for B’s however as he likely paces the almost empty house all night without her there.

It really hit me that the women in this situation, strange as it is these days to have two parents married and in love at the time of a pregnancy, are always the ones everyone asks about but rarely does the father to be even get a nod. (And then we get all upset when they leave us. Maybe if we had shown them they mattered from the start they would not leave. If they knew they counted in the situation perhaps they would feel more connected to it. Right? But I digress.) In this moment B is probably freaking out a hell of a lot more than S because at least she is there with the qualified professionals who are monitoring her every ten seconds. He is in turn pacing around at home all night with their very depressed dog. But they are both strong people and if this is the worst that will happen, it is better to get it out of the way now right? Look on the bright side, the teenage years with two boys cut from B’s genes will be smooth sailing after all. Pause. Insert hysterical laughter here.

They both have breathed a sigh of relief even though she was admitted for another week and the potential exists that she will be spending the next nine in there eating delicious hospital food in her room with broken curtains and a missing VCR remote. Overall their moods are much lighter though – we even joked how the boys will come out all buff since they are on the ‘roids (for lung development just in case of an early delivery). Additionally, S noted that since her shower is scheduled for mid August she can be like the Godfather if they let her go home on bed rest; laying there while everyone comes in and out paying their “tribute” to her. Sadly, it is looking more and more like the shower will be going on without her. None of us will ever forgive her if we have to play a bunch of silly games because of her absence. This is all just a ploy to get out of girly crap, we know it. Lucky.

Today Matt & I are going to head in and bring 80’s Edition Trivial Pursuit so we can all have some real life fun. I wonder if the hospital would mind us playing Rock Band? Oh, never mind, I’m sure B already asked and it would be there already if it was approved.

Here’s a laugh for you S. I somehow doubt the way back is available in this one. Taken while on the way in to visit you, totally appropriate. Hang in there girl and do not forget that freedom isn’t free, it costs a buck ‘oh five.


Freedom costs a buck 'oh five.

EDIT: S was moved to a really awesome corner room yesterday. Now at least she has a view through the window and not only that but a DVD/VCR combo that has a remote and works! Her spirits were lifted immediately getting into that room because it was filled with so much more light and seemed bigger than the last. The nurse kept telling her that she had to "stay pregnant" now so she could take full advantage of the new room situation. We need to buy Trivial Pursuit 90's Edition before our next visit though, 80's just sucked.

15 comments:

ginger said...

well, i'm certainly relieved that they're all okay!

that said, i used to work in health care and for a short time i even did some home health care.

much of it was for women pregnant with twins and triplets (most of whom were artificially inseminated, but that's besides the point). anyway, they reached a point where, essentially, the multiple babies put too much pressure on the cervix so it began to thin early and what happened to your friend would happen to them as well. the result is spending most of the rest of your term in bed to keep the weight off of the cervix. there was one woman who was only allowed to get up to go to the bathroom and shower and only for 10 minutes or less at a time.

they didn't need my help for any medical care, i was basically there as a housekeeper for a couple of hours every day.

so, long story short, what has happened here is more common than you think so they're all okay. she's probably just in the hospital because her insurance doesn't cover home health care.

Jenn Flynn-Shon said...

Thanks Ginger, actually everything you said (the thinning, etc) is exactly what is going on with her! Plus she is a tiny little thing (5'6" about 110 lbs) so the added weight was even more difficult for her. From the back she doesn't even look pregnant. They live on the 2nd floor of a walk through 2 family & there are about a billion stairs to get in & out of the house, laundry down 4 flights in the basement, etc. I think the doctors kind of freaked when they were told about the home situation & just decided it was safer to keep her there for now. They did say however if she is still status quo next Tuesday they will send her home with a seat for the shower & B already said he will begin working from home everyday as soon as she gets to come home. They are the best & like I said, very strong people. It was just a shock I think more than anything else because she wasn't expecting this type of thing to happen for at least 4 more weeks.

Thanks for putting me even more at ease :) I will pass on this info to her later today!

Jenn Flynn-Shon said...

No, that is down 2 flights to the basement, not 4.

Judi FitzPatrick said...

Please pass along my love and hugs to S&B and the little guys. I'm keeping them in my thoughts and sending out the happy vibes.
Hugs, Mum

Judi FitzPatrick said...

Forgot to ask, what's with the old beat-up station wagon?

Jenn Flynn-Shon said...

Love & hugs have been passed on to all :) The station wagon is just one of those inside joke things, would be too difficult to explain it!

High Desert Diva said...

Yowzer. Glad everyone is doing ok...hard times....

Sweet Olive Press | Helen said...

I was really relieved to get to the part where they're all ok!

High-risk pregnancies are really scary... I'm glad she's surrounded by professionals and great supportive friends.

Julie said...

So glad to hear everything is under control. Our #2 was born about 6 weeks early, which makes me nervous about if/when we have a #3, since that means I'm likely to deliver early again. Regardless, it's great that you guys are visiting. If she does deliver early where the little guys need to stay in a special care nursery at all, (especially then) be sure to keep the visits rolling. The hardest part about pre-term delivery is the *empty* feeling of not being able to hold the little one(s) that has/have been a part of you for so many long months! It's a lonely thing, so company helps. :)

Judi FitzPatrick said...

Glad to read the EDIT portion and that she is feeling better about the situation. How is B?
Love to all, Judi

Chris Stone said...

Good luck to your friends and you! It sounds like she is in good hands.

Suldog said...

The reason the 80's edition sucks is because the 80's sucked. I'm just saying...

Octavine Illustration said...

first of all, i can't wait to read your novel. i would like to order an autographed copy, please.
secondly....i'm so glad that she's okay! my friend also was pregnant with twins and on bed rest for three months. so hard. but you guys are awesome. i think various decades of trivial pursuit knowledge will cheer anyone's spirits and so many movies to catch up on! but i'm so thankful her and the boys are okay. you all are in my thoughts. and keep the novel coming...i can't wait.

Bridgete said...

Yeah, I have twin cousins and because my uncle was in the military at the time the military doctors MADE her go on bedrest really early, before any problems had even started. As a result, the boys were actually born a little late, I think.

But anyway, I'm quite relieved they're all okay. No matter how common it is, it's still scary.

Oh, and on the subject of dads, my dad apparently had to yell at the midwife when she was refusing to take my mom to the hospital when it was pretty clear the home birth thing was not working out. No one ignored his worries after that. But yes, generally people do forget that he's just as worried, if not more so.

kim* said...

wow that's crazy